It is
officially spring in my world, and this year in addition to the warming
temperatures and opening flowers, I’m surrounded by kittens and bunnies to
really drive the season’s message home. Before life on the farm, this would be
serious go-time in my world. Landscaping in April is a mad rush of gearing up
for the season and fielding multiple tasks along with juggling clients impatient to get things done.
Warm days often bring back this anxious feeling that I need
to “get to it” and I find myself making lists and looking about frantically at
how far behind I am. Kellen often has to deal with my exasperation at how little
is done and my spouting off a to-do list that MUST be done now. Thank God for
that man’s patience and sense of humor. He listens, often laughs, and tells me
to go play with Millie or pet a kitten and relax. “Enjoy life. We will get
to it.” Even if he knows we won’t be doing whatever “it” I’m freaking out about
any time soon.
The first year Kellen and I were together I left two jobs and slowly stopped my
gardening service business; there was just too much life to live down here and
working off the farm actually makes starting a farm harder, in our opinion.
Sure, we might potentially gross immediate capital to do more faster, but there
are only so many hours and four hands to work with. We believe
investing our whole selves is the most important part of getting this farm going.
Farming isn’t a job, it’s a lifestyle, and it takes all you’ve got: mind, body,
and soul.
I’ve traded a life of two or more jobs at any given time for one whole lifestyle of continuing growth. There’s just as much to
do, with an infinite potential to do more everyday on the farm. Built in is the option
to rest and not do anything- and sometimes it’s not an option, the weather, funds, or other factors slow down the process. It has been difficult for me to adjust and
accept this gift of available time. Last year we spent carving out a
space to live and function, but this year we’re really digging into the farming.
Kellen’s got the corn seed en route to plant our 70 acres of tillable ground
plus renting additional acreage from a neighboring farm. I’ve got cut flower and herb seeds sprouting in the greenhouse-
we’re starting slow with the cut flowers as I need to establish a market and see
how the growing goes. It’s hard not to get itchy feet to get out and weed my
beds or plant more seed; the capacity to grow is there. But we still have much infrastructure yet to build which makes tending our current animals and crop load a challenge. We’re off-grid (more on this in another post) and building structures, amending fields, and fixing equipment falls squarely in Kellen’s shoulders, with a little assistance from me when it’s feasible with a five month old in tow.
My main job in this
new lifestyle is to live my life. Growing Millie up and making time to cherish
her and not just pack her up to “get things done” is the mindset I strive for
everyday. I can’t say I succeed at it everyday, but I try to get my head in that
space when the habit of a “to-do” list looms. It’s a “to-live” mindset that
matters. Kellen works tirelessly to make our life possible, all the while
reminding me to enjoy life and these moments, and doing his best to take time
enjoying a slow morning with Millie and me as often as he can. Today, for
example, as I sit here with a sleeping baby on my lap and a mama Lucy nursing
her kittens on the floor next to me, is the perfect day to live the life I’ve
been given and do as I am able, all in good time.
